Coping With Disappointments…

One of the many beauties of writing for me is that its a form of release, especially when I am unhappy and feeling down. I woke up this morning to a happening  that has changed the course of things around me for a long time to come, and I am unhappy about it. Surprisingly, I have not shed a tear.

Somehow, I am convinced that everything will work out just fine in the end and this assurance comes from the fact that I know beyond reasonable doubt that God in His infinite sovereignty will sort us out and that this too will pass. That is my coping mechanism, its how I deal with disappointments. I remind myself that no matter how bad the situation might be or how hard it may seem, no matter how blurry my vision might be and how many tears I have cried, Its important to focus on the big picture and not to lose sight of what will be.

I don’t know what your coping mechanisms are or how you deal with disappointments, but I would like to know. I need reminders that there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Be kind enough to share with me your coping mechanisms, I need all the help I can get.

The Lekki Joggers…

Fitness is important, no doubt. Jogging is a good cardiac exercise and is highly encouraged. Men and women all over the world, keep fit in so many ways and the primary aim of jogging is to keep fit.

In the suburbs of Lekki however, jogging has become a social activity. I was going to work one morning minding my business until  I saw a lady, very well endowed I must say, clad in a sports bra and a pair of itsy bitsy shorts, she looked like a Victoria’s Secret angel, strutting down the run way that is the Ikoyi Link Bridge. What struck me as odd was the fact that she was fully made up! the whole nine yards, complete with false lashes and red lipstick and I found myself wondering why she needed makeup to jog, since she was going to get so sweaty anyway.

I didn’t have to wonder for too long because my questions were answered almost immediately. I became aware that I was not the only one who had noticed Her Royal Sumptuousness’ in all her glory stopping every now and then to dab delicately at her sweaty brows. Then came a guy who was dressed as though he was out for a jog but couldn’t possibly be because he had his ipad and two cell phones with him. From my vantage point, I saw him beckon to Miss. Itsy Bitsy shorts and she flashed him a super bright smile. They got talking and just when I was about to crane my neck to see what would happen next, the traffic jam in front of us cleared and the shuttle zoomed off.

Over the ensuing weeks I have observed the same trend, ladies jogging in the sexiest apparels they can think of and while I agree that we live in the 21st Century, this is Nigeria and such sights will still give some people a jolt.

Am I closed-minded? not at all, I just found it interesting to note how jogging, a seemingly dull activity has been transformed into a social activity.

A Letter To The Abducted Chibok Girls…

Dear Girls,

How are you all holding up? Its been 224 days since you were snatched away from life as you all knew it, Away from family, friends and all that you held dear. Words cannot express how harrowing and depressing this situation has been for your family, for us all. I cannot begin to imagine how you feel, how scared and dejected you must be.

If you could read this, you will know that we are scared, terrorized and tortured by the thoughts of what has happened. It would be unfair to say we share your pain, because again, we cannot begin to imagine the pain you feel but we hurt too, we are worried sick and I personally feel so helpless.

There are so many questions I want to ask, some of them might seem silly but they weigh me down. Do you all have change of clothes, body lotions, sanitary towels? who makes your hair? do you have clean combs? are you keeping warm? all these thoughts and many more run through my mind and its all I can do not to break down and howl, but we have to be strong.

Don’t give up on us, we haven’t given up on you yet, we never will. Women are fighting hard for your return, risking it all and screaming out loud for you. Oby Ezekwesili, Hadiza Bala Usman and a lot of us in our own little spaces are praying fervently for your return. Hold each other up, do not let the darkness consume you, don’t let the burdens weigh you down, keep the hope alive, keep faith, all will be well.

If you could read this, you will know that we love you, we have not forgotten you and as hopeless as it might seem, you all will come out of this ordeal sunny side up by God’s special grace.

Your Sister,


Be Inspired Friday: Young CEOS Under 30, Doing What They Do Best…

Young people are making giant strides in the world today, and its encouraging to see how businesses are being set up and sustained. Be on the lookout every Friday because we will get to meet young entrepreneurs who started their businesses from scratch, find out the challenges they face and how they find their way through the maze that is the business world.

Today’s CEO is Bernard Shaibu: Shaibu Benard Abu a graduate of Management Information System and a member of E-Council.  With experience in Banking, (Internship), Entertainment and Consulting (Visa Consultant). He believes everyone was born with equal opportunity to succeed irrespective of their path to greatness (artist, entrepreneur, motivational speaker, etc.) His philosophy about life has always remain “life is an adventure therefore be adventurous”.  Hem & Omakie Nigeria is proudly a Nigerian based shoe-design Company. We manufacture a wide range of vasertile design in hand-crafted dress shoes for men, women and children as well. Our dream is to set the pace in a vast range of bespoke shoe design and production with an international competitive edge. At Hem & Omakie, every stitch, seam & tuck reflects a drive for quality & excellence in what they do.The Company’s long term mission is to carve a niche as leader in bespoke shoe manufacturing in Africa and beyond, by establishing an upscale, retail presence in Nigeria.

Here is how our chit chat went:

AD: Bernard, Hi, how are you today?

Bernard: I am fine today Ada, and you?

AD: I am well thank God. You have been making quite a splash lately so its only natural I had to talk to you.

Bernard: Yes dear, all thanks to God.

AD: So lets get right down to it, I know you are a busy man and time they say, is money. You studied Management Information System, how come you are making shoes now?

Bernard: Yes, MIS was my discipline in school, but fashion is my passion.

AD: Hem&Omakie is an interesting name, how did you come up with it?

Bernard: Hem&Omakie was coined from two words: “Schehem and Omachonu” which means: Resourceful people rule.

AD: Well said, so how is going so far?

Bernard: I got to realize I would only be running away from my own shadows if shy away what I love to the best, cos at the long run I would still find myself coming back to it! Well, Ada, it hasn’t been a bed of roses, because we are still pretty new in the market, n to get to the top, lots has to be done, so I wouldn’t say its a smooth one right now.

AD: Walk me briefly through the process of making a shoe.

Bernard: Well, shoe making is not a brief process, but however, I would try: first, you need to draw out a design, cut out them out a cardboard papers which we call pattern making, then have pattern cut out on the kind of fabric you want for your design, sew the fabric in areas required, have the sown fabrics transferred in form of a shoe mold, then of course you include the  soles beneath the mold and with a little finishing touch, you have a pair of shoes made for yourself!

AD: Wow! you make it sound easy.

Bernard: Yeah well, you wanted a nutshell, so I guess that is a good way to put an entire process in a nutshell, pending when we meet at the factory for practicals.(Laughs)

AD: I will definitely visit soon. So how many employees do have at the moment?

Bernard: Well, at the moment we have two major head cobblers, and a few tentative staff. We look forward to expanding and growing into a larger market share.

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A Hem&Omakie Creation

AD: I am sure you have had some challenges, please share a few with me

Bernard: The challenges we have had, have helped us see the bigger picture. Inconsistency in the supply of some fabric, (as most of our fabrics used are imported), power supply also poses a huge challenge, considering the huge demand for our brand, sometimes we don’t even know where to start from when we have a lot to do over the night and all of a sudden,  power failure comes to play. But through it all, we are learning as we go and soon we’ll do it all with our eyes closed. Also, we are faced with the challenge of meeting demands, because we do not have the heavy duty machines required to produce in very large quantity to meet the Nigerian  market but I know this won’t be  for long as we work tirelessly to achieve it.

AD: Tell me, If I want to purchase a pair of Hem&Omakie shoes right now, how would I go about it?

Bernard: Well are currently on about 5 online stores which includes,,, so u can actually seat down at home with u phone or ipad n make an order without much stress! However our website is still in process n would be live soon! For the interim our facebook page can also be accessed via

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AD: That is really impressive, any plans to launch a female line soon?
Bernard: Yes oh! Its all in the cooking pot, and as soon as the meal is ready, we will not hesitate to serve all the Nigerian ladies both home and abroad, with our unique brand, so be on the look out.
AD: One word for young people who are looking to go into the shoe business?
Bernard: Well, I am still growing in the business and I am learning as I go, but focus and determination is what keeps you going in this line of business,especially here in Nigeria where there are a lot of limitations. If it is your dream, stay true to it.
AD: Thank you so much for taking the time to chat with me, I am looking forward to wearing your shoes one day soon.
Bernard: Its my absolute pleasure, I’ll look forward to that as well.
Its the holidays soon, for uniquely distinct shoes, click on any of the links above and you will be happy you did.
Enjoy your weekend!

Bernard Shaibu, CEO HEM&OMAKIE

We Are Not Conundrums…

Women are not complex or difficult riddles, we are not conundrums. We are reasonable, smart and very articulate people. We do our best to express ourselves, but a certain specie of the human race seem to find it difficult to comprehend us sometimes.

If only they would actually listen, actually try to hear us, life would be so much easier. Yes, maybe we cry a little sometimes, or throw a hissing fit when sometimes things don’t go our way, it doesn’t make us difficult or impossible to understand. Sometimes all we need is a little understanding.

Appreciate the women in your life today. Listen when they speak and engage them in productive, level headed conversations rather than shouting matches and you just might find that they are easy to comprehend after all.

Women are not conundrums, nor riddles or complicated puzzles, we are rational people who just want to be listened to.

Top CV Cliches And Why They Should Be Avoided

I found this post very helpful because after a quick dash to review my CV I found myself guilty of almost all the cliches. I hope you find it helpful as well.


Are you motivated, a team player and hard working?
Are you able to work on your own initiative?
Of course you are and so are most of the people applying for the same job as you. If you really want to make an impact with a prospective employer you need to think about avoiding CV cliches and show some originality in your approach!
Common clichés to avoid:
• Results oriented – as opposed to what? No one intentionally sets themselves up to fail; being focused on solving problems will be expected of you no matter what job you do.
• Highly motivated – again as opposed to lazy? Generally employers will assume that you’re motivated based on the fact that you are actively searching for your next job opportunity. It would be better to provide examples of how you’ve proven your motivation.
• Strong work ethic – again, you are…

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How I Fell In Love…

How I fell in love with the following TV series! I’m sure you were expecting a love story, Oh well this is a love story, only that its not a man I fell in love with but with the following five amazingly interesting and spell binding shows.

The number one on the list is Grey’s Anatomy- I fell in love with Grey’s My first year in the University and its a love affair that has lasted nine long  years and counting. I have cried, laughed and learned a lot from this show.


Grey’s Anatomy is an American medical drama television series that premiered on the American Broadcasting Company on March 27, 2005. The series has aired ten seasons, and focuses on the fictional lives of surgical interns and residents as they gradually evolve into seasoned doctors, while trying to maintain personal lives and relationships. The title is a play on the name Gray’s Anatomy, an English-language human anatomy textbook originally written by Henry Gray. The series was created to be racially diverse, utilizing a color-blind casting technique. While the show is set in Seattle, it is primarily filmed in Los Angeles, California. My favorite character is and always will be Dr. Derek Shepard aka Mcdreamy played by the talented Patrick Dempsey.

The second on the list is Scandal. Looking back now I don’t believe how hesitant I was to watch Scandal, but and I eventually did an it was love at first episode.


Scandal is an American political thriller television series starring Kerry Washington. Created by Shonda Rhimes, it debuted on ABC on April 5, 2012. Kerry Washington’s character, Olivia Pope, is partially based on former George H.W. Bush administration press aide Judy Smith, who serves as a co-executive producer. The show takes place in Washington, D.C. and focuses on Olivia Pope’s crisis management firm, Olivia Pope & Associates, and its staff, as well as staff at the White House. Olivia Pope (Kerry Washington) is a former White House Communications Director for the president of the United States who has left to start her own crisis management firm, Olivia Pope & Associates. Olivia has decided to dedicate her life to protecting the public images of the nation’s elite but is finding that no matter how hard she tries, she cannot leave parts of her past behind. I am torn between Rowan Pope, aka Command, Olivia’s father who is played by Joe Morton and Olivia Pope.

The third show that has recently joined this list of mine is How To Get Away With Murder, I am sure that by now its clear that I am huge fan of Shonda Rhimes seeing that two of my top  five shows were created by her. This show is still in its first season but it has immense potential, my gut tells me so.


How to Get Away with Murder is an American serial legal drama series that premiered on ABC on September 25, 2014. The series was created by Peter Nowak produced by Shonda Rhimes and distributed by ABC Studios. Viola Davis stars as a law professor at a prestigious Philadelphia university who, with her students, becomes entwined in a murder plot. The series airs in the slot after Scandal on Thursdays at 10:00 p.m. The pilot was favorably received by critics, specifically praising Viola Davis’ performance. The series premiere, on September 25, 2014, had more than 14 million viewers on live broadcast, and over 20 million with DVR. The suspense on this show is almost too much to bear and my favorite character is definitely Wes Gibbins played  by Alfred Enoch. He’s doing an amazing job.

Now number four is Suits, my sister made me watch it and now I am glad she did. The show makes wish I studied Law like I meant to, before Advertising stole my heart.


Suits is a USA Network drama created by Aaron Korsh.The series is set at Pearson Hardman, a fictional law firm in New York City. Mike, once a college scholarship recipient and on his way to becoming a law student at Harvard University, was kicked out of college for selling the answers to a math test he had memorized, ruining his chances of attending law school. Mike instead makes a living as a bicycle messenger, and is convinced by his friend Trevor to take part in a marijuana deal. The deal happens to be a sting operation which Mike astutely discovers and narrowly avoids, instead stumbling into a job interview with Harvey, a lawyer at Hardman and arguably the “best closer in New York City”. Recently made senior partner, Harvey must hire a Harvard-educated lawyer as an associate, as per firm policy. Using his eidetic memory and legal knowledge, Mike proves to Harvey he is undoubtedly the best candidate and is subsequently hired, despite neither receiving a college degree nor attending Harvard. The series focuses on Mike and Harvey as they try cases for the firm while maintaining Mike’s secret. Again I am torn between choosing a favorite character on this show I absolutely love Harvey Specter, played by Gabriel Macht and Donna Paulsen played by Sarah Rafferty.

The last but not the least loved show on this list of mine is the critically acclaimed Game of Thrones! I was the biggest critic of GOT and I couldn’t be bothered to watch it, but I was so wowed when I stumbled upon an episode that it sent me on a week long binge watching to catch up on all the awesomeness I had been missing.


Game of Thrones is an American fantasy drama television series created for HBO by David Benioff . It is an adaptation of A Song of Ice and Fire, George R. R. Martin’s series of fantasy novels,The series, set on the fictional continents of Westeros and Essos at the end of a decade-long summer, interweaves several plot lines. The first follows the members of several noble houses in a civil war for the Iron Throne of the Seven Kingdoms; the second covers the rising threat of the impending winter and the Southerners’ fear of the legendary creatures and fierce peoples of the North; the third chronicles the attempts of the exiled last scion of the realm’s deposed ruling dynasty to reclaim the throne. Through its exploration of the ambitions and morals of its many characters, the series explores issues of social hierarchy, religion, loyalty, corruption, civil war, crime, and punishment.Game of Thrones has attracted record numbers of viewers on HBO and obtained an exceptionally broad and active international fan base. It received widespread acclaim by critics, although its frequent use of nudity, violence and sexual violence has attracted criticism, the series has won numerous awards and nominations. My favorite character is a no brainier, Tyrion Lannister played by Peter Dinkalge. I am sitting on pins and needles waiting for season five.

So there! that is the story of how I fell in love with five amazing shows and a brief synopsis of said shows. What are your favorite shows?

Source: Wikipedia and Google