So I had a cut on my thigh. I don’t know how it got there but it did. My body has been working hard to heal the cut, but I won’t let it be. Each time the scar tries to dry up, I pick at it till it bleeds again (sorry for the TMI &don’t judge me) it feels good when I pick at it, but when it opens up and starts to bleed again it hurts like crazy and I sit there and ask myself why? Why did I have to put myself through that unnecessary pain that my body is working so hard to help me avoid?
It went off like a light bulb in my sleep deprived head just now at 1:44 am, that this is exactly how we sabotage ourselves sometimes. We put ourselves in situations we know will hurt us and then wonder why it hurts so much!. Transparency moment: I am very guilty of this. Sometime ago, I learned the art of accepting my portion of the blame when something happens to me. Over a period of time I have seen that I sometimes lead myself into these situations that cause me pain. Most times the warnings are right there! Flashing like a neon sign, but loneliness tends to numb my instincts and then I find myself in a world of pain.
Liken my scar to a break up. Let that pain go! Let it go. Rereading old messages and stalking on social media and reminiscing is picking at the scar that’s trying so hard to heal. You’ll pick and pick and you’ll start to bleed again and the only person who’ll be in pain is you.
Letting go is the best thing you can do sometimes, it might even be all you can do, so do it, let go. The scar will heal and you’ll be brand new again. Now that I have shared my little epiphany, it’s time to switch off this phone and attempt to sleep… thanks again for reading my ramblings on my little old blog.
“All you can do is all you can do; but all you can do is enough…- Art Williams