Oh! But I Care..

I know you thought the joke was funny but it made my heart bleed a little

I know I said it didn’t matter but It did

I know you think that what you did was okay but it really wasn’t

I know you think I should get over it already, but I need time

I know you think I should be a certain type of way but this is me

I know you think I didn’t notice, but trust me I did 

You probably think I should speak up often but don’t you know that words can be hard to find?

I wish you understood

You say you do but do you really?

All these expectations

These lofty expectations you hold me to

Do you expect them from yourself or is it just for me?

Don’t cry, don’t feel, don’t this, don’t that

These expectations are a burden

So I thought I should let you know

That these things

All these things you think I don’t see or feel

I see and feel them 

All these things you think I don’t care about

I care, Oh! I care a lot.

 

• Adaugo, 2019